No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
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