what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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