so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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