there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
Randomize
