WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Randomize
