Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
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