what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
He kissed a someone with a penis
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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