We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize
