theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
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