What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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