i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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