dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
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