Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Randomize
