It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
It's blow job season.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
