dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
Randomize