YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I am in a vortex of obligation.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
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