I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Randomize