i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
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