yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Randomize
