So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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