I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
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