He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
