she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
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