In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
