I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
Randomize
