They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Randomize
