I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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