If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Randomize
