Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
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