What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
We smell like vodka and hangover
Randomize
