Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
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