whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
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