I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
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