Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Randomize
