Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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