so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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