You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
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