Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
the liver wants what the liver wants
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
