Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Randomize
