D3 body, D1 cock
Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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