i think my tv is drunk
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Randomize