some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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