On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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