Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
Randomize