he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Randomize
