I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
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