Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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