Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Randomize
