got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
is this the sara with the beer cane?
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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