guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Randomize
