Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
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